Control

If God is salvation and God is my judge. Then I can let go and say God take me away if you need me somewhere else. I can say “God, if I don’t deserve to be in this world anymore, take me out.” And if God does nothing, keeps me right in the same place where I begged for death. Let it be a sign that I am right where I’m supposed to be. Let it be a sign that I don’t have to keep searching to escape.

Stop trying to go somewhere to feel better. You’re already there.

Stop trying to change things that are out of your control. You can only control yourself.

If your mind starts to race at the thought of controlling yourself. Slow down the process and breathe.

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…Breathe.

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…Breathe.

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…Breathe.

That inner voice that was turned against you will guide you back to where you are supposed to be. You will be free from listening and obeying that inner voice that slowly became your enemy. You will slowly get control over it again.

When you feel more in control of your thoughts.

Let that voice be your guide, your teacher, your master again. Be a good student. Be a good listener.

Learn to know when that inner voice is testing you, and when it is guiding you.

Listen for the difference.

If the voice is testing you, seeing if you’ll fall into sin again, show the voice you are in control.

If it is clear the voice is guiding you towards your goals. Towards who you want to become. Follow it without hesitation.